Sports Outside the Beltway

Lakers’ Brown in Cake Caper

In the most bizarre sports story of the day, Los Angeles Laker Kwame Brown took a man’s cake and threw it at him:

A man walking down the street at bar-closing time with a $190 cake in his arms claimed Los Angeles Lakers center Kwame Brown swiped his birthday treat.

But authorities said the cake caper won’t be prosecuted.

In a police report, Alexander Martinez said he left his 30th birthday celebration at the Shore Restaurant and Lounge at about 1:45 a.m. Saturday with the uneaten 2-by-2-foot cake and walked north toward the Blue 32 nightclub.

Martinez told police he first came upon Lakers forward Ronny Turiaf, who he said agreed to pose for a photograph with him and the chocolate cake.

But outside of Blue 32, the 6-foot-11, 270-pound Brown came along, grabbed the cake and threw it at Martinez, according to the report. Brown got into a white limousine and left, Martinez claimed in the report, although he didn’t suggest any reason for the cake toss.

Martinez reported that he then walked up to Lamar Odom as the Lakers forward left Pedone’s Pizza and confronted him about the cake, which was splattered on the birthday man’s back.

A man believed to be Odom’s bodyguard pushed Martinez into the street, yelling at him to get away from Odom, the police report said.

“Calm down, he didn’t do anything,” Odom told the man believed to be his bodyguard, the report said.

This goes along with the general belief that nothing good happens at 2 AM. Good thing Odom was a cooler head in the situation. Of course this isn’t the first bizarre thing Kwame has done. While playing for the Washington Wizards he would carry a bottle of French dressing to dinner after the upsetting discovery that French dressing wasn’t available at a French Restaurant.

The most important question is why would Kwame would do that, but also why was a 30 year old man carrying a cake at 2 AM in Hermosa Beach. Also don’t these guys have practice? I know AI wasn’t involved so they should be there and well rested, in theory. Just another reason why I love the NBA.


Phil Jackson: Shaq Lazy, Wade Cheats

LA Lakers coach Phil Jackson reignited the Lakers-Heat feud by calling Shaquille O’Neal lazy and saying that Dwayne Wade gets away with cheating on his patented spin move.

Jackson, who once upon a time seemed to favor his star center over his star shooting guard, on Sunday called out O’Neal, saying he was “the only person I’ve ever had that hasn’t been a worker.”

Shaq, who is rarely at a loss for words, was asked about Jackson’s comments on Monday following Miami’s 101-85 win over O’Neal’s former team. “How can Benedict Arnold be reliable in what he says?” the Big Aristotle was quoted as saying in Tuesday’s edition of The Los Angeles Times. O’Neal declined to elaborate on his statement and, since he was in street clothes for the game, was not required to give a formal post-game interview.

O’Neal and Bryant had been feuding since O’Neal’s trade to Miami following the 2003-04 season. But last year the two superstars stated publicly that they had reconciled their differences.

Then came Jackson’s comments on Sunday.

“He’s the one guy that didn’t really like to work,” said the coach who boasts nine NBA championship rings. “I know Pat [Riley] got him working here in Miami. We had a hard time getting him to work. All the other players — Michael [Jordan], Scottie [Pippen], Dennis Rodman, all those guys that we had, Horace Grant, they’re all hard-working practice and personal work players.”

Of course, O’Neal was not the only player Jackson prodded. Speaking about Dwyane Wade, Shaq’s new partner in crime and last year’s NBA Finals MVP, Jackson said, “He travels on that spin move. He picks up that pivot foot … everybody knows it. Dwyane Wade can cover so much ground when he makes that move. As you know, he can go 20 feet with that spin move and get to the basket.”

It’s really quite bizarre. Shaq did carry the Lakers to three straight NBA championships under Jackson; one doesn’t do that without putting forth some reasonable amount of effort. Conversely, the Kobe-led Lakers have been abysmal without the big, lazy oaf.


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